Talking to children about other people’s differences can be extremely uncomfortable. Many parents worry endlessly about answering their children’s questions, especially those asked while in an open, public space. This concern may come from the lack of such communication in the parent’s own childhood. However, if parents want to raise children, who are inclusive, these uncomfortable conversations are inevitable.
An adult topic
When one talks about diversity, it’s not just about gender and race. Characteristics such as age, physical abilities, ethnicity and sexual orientation are considered.
When parents are faced with questions like, “Mom, why does that person walk like that” or “Dad, why does that person look like that,” often their first thought is that to protect their children, or to avoid confusing them, it is best not to answer them. But even if they think this is a topic for when children grow up, there is no way parents can fully protect their children from seeing or hearing examples of prejudice, difference or discrimination.
The examples
Children are born without prejudice. They are built in them over time because of the examples they see around them, both among the people in their environment and in their books and toys. While in the childhoods of those who are now adults it is unlikely thay they had book characters or toys that were different, today’s children are exposed to more examples. In 2022, Barbie introduced a series of dolls that represent people with different disabilities, for example a doll with a hearing aid, a prosthetic leg or with the skin disease vitiligo.
The importance of inclusive communication
A child’s question or a specific incident may be the reason to start a conversation on the topic of diversity. It could be a commercial on TV or something that happens in the park that provokes a question or comment from the child. The parent should emphasize using respectful and inclusive language. In relation to people with different physical abilities, inclusive language puts the person first and the disability second. Phrases such as “deaf person” are not recommended, “a person who is deaf” is preferred. Any equipment that a person can use should be framed as something that helps the person, not something that limits them. An example of this is the expression ‘wheelchair bound’, the more inclusive alternative of which is ‘a person who uses a wheelchair’.
