Microaggressions occur in everyday life and sometimes go unnoticed by those who were not the target of the particular comment or joke. Although the name suggests that it is something small and harmless, microaggressions create the feeling of a hostile, dismissive or negative attitude.
Like a mosquito bite, they are unpleasant, they leave a “trace” for a while. To continue the metaphor, when the stings are many, it can lead to intolerance and pose a serious health risk.
Recognizing them
Recognizing microaggressions in everyday life is necessary to eradicate them. Using nicknames, frowning, or other facial expressions as a response to misunderstanding can also count as microaggression behaviors. In addition, jokes or comments related to a person’s race, his capabilities or age are also microaggressions.
Such are statements like “You’re doing great for someone your age” or “You look good for your age.” More often than usual, parents also become the target of microaggressions. If a co-worker comments that another member of the team is late and it’s probably because of taking care of their children, it can be emphasized that lateness is the exception, not the rule, and that anyone can be late regardless of whether he is a parent or not. If the comment of the moment is not taken into account, it means that the position of the one who discriminates is taken.
Strategies for dealing with microaggressions
Microagressions are often found in the form of jokes, innuendos, and comments intended as compliments. When someone exclaims, “You’ve lost weight, you look great,” they’re probably trying to pay a compliment. Behind the weight loss, however, there may be a problem that the recipient of the compliment does not want to comment on, such as an illness or a stressful period they are going through. At such a moment, one can react by thanking the person for the compliment, but reminding that in a professional environment there is no place for conversations about appearance.
Asking the right questions
When a person becomes the target of microaggression or notices one in their environment, a good response is to ask “What do you mean by that?” One should not assume what the person meant by their comment, so asking him/her this question gives them an opportunity to explain. At this point, it is possible that he/she has unconscious prejudices or stereotypes that he/she believes. Choosing the right words and being aware of the effect they can have is extremely important.
Microaffirmations
The opposite side of microaggressions are microaffirmations, small gestures of inclusion such as nodding in support of what the speaker is saying, showing interest by asking questions, listening without interruption, and seeking eye contact during a conversation. Microaffirmations are non-random acts of kindness that can be used in the fight against unconscious bias in the workplace.
When the ways in which words or gestures can make a person feel noticed or ignored are identified, a deliberate attempt can be made to use more gestures of kindness and affirmation in everyday life.
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